Dating avoidant attachment style
He told me that a woman he once dated actually broke up with him by telling him about a book called by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller.
The avoidant person is afraid to get too close to his or her significant other. And when I was with the men that called me needy, I can now see that they had avoidant attachment styles. I have since read the book and found that the authors believe that the anxious or secure person often finds him or herself with an avoidant because the avoidant person makes it back into the dating pool more often.
Unfortunately, about a quarter of the population has an avoidant attachment style and the other quarter has an anxious attachment style.
The anxious person is hypersensitive to the little signs that the other person in the relationship is pulling back or not showing the same level of interest.
He thinks he wants a relationship with me again because he misses me.
Yet, I know that if I give him the attention he wants, he will soon start to pull away again. With anxious attachment, the authors note that “even a slight hint that something may be wrong will activate your attachment system, and once it’s activated, you are unable to calm down until you get a clear indication from your partner that he or she is truly there for you and that the relationship is safe.” So back when I was used to my boyfriend texting me several times a day every day and then one day he didn’t text me at all until p.m., I was on edge and feeling rejected.